10 reasons Mitt Romney isn't running
- His poll numbers weren’t the right height.
- Not sure he can get binders full of votes.
- 47% of corporations are dependent on the government for corporate subsidies. He’s not going to get their votes.
- Jeb Bush promised him he’d be ambassador to the Cayman Islands.
- Speaking of which, Chris Christie threatened traffic problems in the Cayman Islands if he ran.
- He lost a $10,000 bet, so the poor guy is down to his last $250 million.
- Big Bird advised against it.
- Training to beat Paul Ryan’s marathon time.
- Rather than Mitt himself running, he’s getting Bain Capital to run instead. They’re people, my friend!
- Wants to spend more quality time with his money.
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