Jon Stewart uses Dr. Seuss to mock Ted Cruz’s ‘hours of mouth masturbation’
By Arturo GarciaSince Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) took some time during his 21-hour speech against the Affordable Care Act to read Green Eggs & Ham, Daily Show host Jon Stewart used his own Dr. Seuss character, “The Bore-Ax,” to explain the problems with Cruz’s stance.
“Ted talked about healthcare, compared it to Nazis,” Stewart read to his audience. “As comparisons go, he was off by a lot-zi. Healthcare, he said, would end this great nation. A point made after hours of mouth masturbation.”
Stewart also spent his opening segment addressing Cruz, pointing out the logical fallacy in Cruz reading Green Eggs and Ham while making his case for not funding the new law.
“So to express your opposition to Obamacare, you go with a book about a stubborn jerk who decides he hates something before he’s tried it,” Stewart noted. “And when he finally does get a taste, he has to admit after tasting it, ‘This is pretty fuc*ing good.’”
Besides mocking the Texas Republican’s vow to speak until he could no longer stand — “Easy for you to take that kind of risk. You’ve got government health care,” he said — Stewart also chided Cruz for arguing that the law was costing the country healthcare and jobs before even being implemented, while being proud of himself for helping cause the government sequester, which has already taken effect.
“For all its flaws, Obamacare appears to be at least attempting to fix some fundamental holes in our healthcare system, like insurance companies being able to deny [patients] based on pre-existing conditions,” Stewart said to Cruz. “So if you’re gonna repeal it, you’d better have some idea of your own how to do that. Pre-existing conditions, how would you do that?”
Upon hearing Cruz advocate for a market-based solution without offering specifics, though, Stewart concluded, “You got nothin’.”