Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Elisabeth Hasselbeck Knows Who Is ‘Smart,’ And That Is Young People Who Don’t Buy Insurance Because They Will Never Get Sick

Elisabeth Hasselbeck Knows Who Is ‘Smart,’ And That Is Young People Who Don’t Buy Insurance Because They Will Never Get Sick 

 by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Founding Mensa member and Fox & Friends cohost Elisabeth Hasselbeck knows genius when she sees it. Where has Elisabeth Hasselbeck seen genius today? In “young invincibles” refusing to buy insurance!

     “You know who is playing it smart?” Hasselbeck began. “Young invincibles. The young set out there who are not buying into Obamacare because they’re seeing situations like this and saying, ‘I’m not going to be the one responsible for paying for everybody else. That’s not what was sold to me.’ So they’re not signing up. Government’s freaking out because they need the young people to pay for Obamacare.”

We have never heard that particular formulation before, but who are we to question what is “smart” and what is “the opposite of that.”

But why does Hasselbeck want young people to be “smart” and not buy insurance? Oh, the usual reasons: young healthy people would have to pay for old sick people, by being alive, at the same time, in the same nation. (This is sort of like how people who buy Wonkette T-shirts are subsidizing people who buy Smoking Joe cups, because it does not cost anywhere near $7.99 to ship a T-shirt, and it costs way way more than $7.99 to ship a cup! We call it “socialism.” We also call it “we don’t know how to charge different amounts for shipping depending on which product you buy so we sort of tried to charge a happy medium EVEN THOUGH WAY MORE OF YOU buy cups than buy T-shirts.” We also also call it “if you buy a T-shirt AND a cup, you are getting a hell of a deal on shipping, so you should probably do that.”)

But yes, young people, definitely don’t buy insurance because someone, somewhere, might be helped by it if you do. Also, don’t buy anything, because did you know when you buy something you are helping to pay somebody’s salary? What a ripoff, right? Who do they think you are, Richard Branson? Why is it up to you to help pay salaries for all these “takers” doing the job selling you the thing you needed?

Also, it is definitely not like you are ever going to break your leg while snowboarding or whatever the cool “EXTREEEEME” sport is now, you will be fine, you are “invincible.” Also, stop paying your rent, because why is it up to you to make your landlord rich, and you are “invincible” and will never be evicted and if you do “sleeping rough” is very groovy and hep.

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